Establishing your authority

There are a number of problems which may occur over the course of a season due to the behaviour of parents or players. These include attendance problems; disruptions/misconduct during practice or games; “overly-helpful” parents; and parents who are chronic gripers. Difficulties in handling these four problems are why most coaches to decide to give up coaching, so it is very important to learn how to deal with them.
Dealing with discipline problems

The first trick in learning to handle players is to establish your authority early. If players do not get the idea that you are the “boss”, and that you will insist that they follow your rules, it will be very difficult to control them. Here are some time-honoured ways to get this message across early.

Tips on Asserting Your Authority

  • Using “the Voice” and “the Look”

It’s important for players to be able to recognize by your tone of voice and your manner when you intend a no-nonsense directive, or are drawing a boundary which they try to cross at their peril. Yelling does not work. Use a firm voice and a firm look, and DEMAND attention. Make it clear that this is non-negotiable – and your chances that they will listen increase substantially. Watch for their reaction, however. It is easy to scare little ones with a tone of voice which might induce teenagers to slowly think about complying – so adjust to your audience.

  • The Art of Refocusing Attention

Sometimes a quick, firm word in passing is enough to get things back on track without stopping an ongoing activity. If this doesn’t work, don’t try to yell or frantically run around to get the attention of the players. STOP the group, DEMAND that they all stop talking and look at you, and WAIT until everyone does so before even trying to start with the substance of your remarks. Using “the Voice”, say something like: “Eyes on me. Now.”

If someone starts clowning or chatting in the background after you start trying to talk substance, STOP! Firmly re-demand silence before continuing. Keep doing this until they shut up, even if you spend 20 minutes on a 30 second announcement. Eventually, the other players will start to tell this player to be quiet, because they will get bored standing around. When the disruptive one starts to get negative attention from his peers, the behaviour tends to cease quickly.

  • Choose Your Battles Wisely

Remember that all young kids misbehave at times. If the child is not normally disruptive or if the disruption is not serious – and is quickly abandoned with a quiet word from you, there is no reason to make a big deal over it.

If you are too stern, and use the proverbial cannon to deal with a small gnat of an offence, this causes two problems. First, the compliant players will start to fear you – and will become so upset by any correction from you that they will tend to freeze up and become afraid to make mistakes for fear of displeasing you (so they won’t learn very well). Secondly, the more spirited or defiant players will figure out that you have already used up all of your ammunition on a trivial offence – so they won’t see any reason why they shouldn’t commit HUGE offences if the punishment is going to be the same anyway. As a result, it is not uncommon to find utter chaos when the coach is not using good judgement on when/how/why/where to punish offences.

  • How to discipline effectively

When misbehaviour seriously disrupts the activities of the other players (either because it is persistent minor stuff or because of one egregious act), the coach needs to use “the Voice” and “the Look” to stop the behaviour instantly.

It is a good idea to talk in terms of Rules – because players tend to remember Rules better. So, tell them that “Hitting a team-mate is against our Rules”.

Then, get the offender to tell you WHY this is against the rules. Forcing the offender to verbalize why other players might not like to be hit serves two purposes. It shows the other players that this kid knew better AND it causes the offender to suffer some humiliation in front of everyone by admitting that he knew better.

Once the player admits that he knew better, make him apologize. Sure, the apology is likely to be grudging – and delivered under his breath in the general direction of his belly button. But, by forcing him to apologize (and making him go sit out until he does apologize, if he initially refuses) helps to breed good sportsmanship down the line – and helps him to recognize that other players have rights too.

Sometimes, of course, a player may not understand why something is against the Rules. For instance, the little brother of a HS-level player may have seen lots of slide tackles in games, and truly may not understand why you got upset when he took out the ankles of a team-mate with a reckless tackle. In those cases, it is important to explain why you are upset, and to explain what you want in the future.

What if one team-mate started it, and the other finished it? Easy. Make them both apologize, then make the retaliator explain to you how he plans to handle things next time (e.g., come to you; use his words instead of his fists; etc.). However, the instigator should not get off scot-free. Consider giving him an extra “punishment” for starting things. Often, especially with arch-rivals, making the instigator say 5 good things about his adversary is quite effective in healing the wounds all around.
Some Tips on Using “Punishments”

Be careful in using physical activity as punishment. Especially with younger players, learning to associate running or exercise with punishment can cause them to resent that activity when you need them to do this work. Nonetheless, there are times when a quick set of jumping jacks or push-ups may help to refocus the player. As long as these are not onerous (no more than 5-10), the players usually accept the penalty with good humour and no lasting effects. However, if the player is looking for attention and wanting to clown around (or wanting to challenge the coach in some fashion), he will use the penance as an opportunity to have fun at the expense of the coach. As a result, if the coach already knows that he is dealing with a defiant player, the best bet may be to tell the player to go sit out until he can behave.

ONE OF THE MOST EFFECTIVE sanctions is forcing the misbehaving player to sit out during an activity. Giving a time-out can often be very effective. Most players want to be with everyone else – even if they are being disruptive.

Usually, the coach will give the player the option of returning when the player decides to behave. However, if the player is refusing to participate in an activity which he doesn’t like, then the better course is to sit the player out for the remainder of the practice. Otherwise, the coach will send the message to the team that, if you don’t want to do an exercise, just go sit down – and you won’t suffer any penalty. Once the players discover that you don’t get to pick and choose what you do, and you don’t get to scrimmage if you don’t work, the incentives will be reduced to seek a time-out simply to avoid doing work.

Okay, so where should the player be sent to sit out? The ideal spot for a player to sit out is where you (or some responsible adult) can keep them in view, but where they are far enough removed they cannot easily create further distraction for the rest of the group. Where and how far will depend on the player, the setting, and the available supervision. (Don’t let a buddy join them for company; if two players must be sent out, send them to opposite ends of the field).
Sometimes carrots work better!

It’s important to not forget to use carrots as well as sticks. Just as in making corrections, good behaviour should be praised and rewarded to reinforce behaviours you want at practices and games. One of the most effective ways to shape up a whole team that’s half-hearted and distracted about whatever subject is the focus of the day’s activities is to make most players’ favourite part of the practice, THE SCRIMMAGE, contingent on the extent they get with the program. “The sooner we learn to do this, the longer we can scrimmage”.
“Full Moon” Days

Sometimes, your players’ energy and mood simply isn’t a good match for the well- intended practice plan you designed. They’re hopelessly restless, with unbounded energy. If the normally cooperative players are exceptionally wild, and none of the adjustments which you make seem to work, consider simply abandoning the plan for the day – and playing nothing but games (the winners of the last game get to pick the next one). As long as the games are soccer-related, the practice session is probably doing more good than you realize. The kids are getting lots of touches on the ball; team morale is soaring because coach is a good guy (and we got a free day); and coach is able to relax and enjoy watching the players act like a bunch of puppies. Consider it a vacation to recharge the batteries, and just have fun.

Soccer coaching’s cardinal sins

This list has made me reflect on my coaching style and try to be a better coach the next time I step onto the coaching field.

Hopefully, it will do the same job for you!

  • The coach boring the group with long-winded speeches.
  • The coach complicating the exercise by offering too much information and by elaborating on the chosen theme by involving too many phases of play.
  • Skills practices becoming endurance work.
  • Forgetting to agree ground rules with the players.
  • Not planning a coaching session in advance.
  • Sticking too rigidly to a session plan!
  • The coach following the ball around instead of observing from a detached position.
  • The coach acting as ball-boy.
  • The coach failing to demonstrate.
  • Ball-boys taking part in the exercise.
  • Poor organization of the footballs.
  • Not having a football per player at training sessions.
  • The coach offering instructions while running.
  • Criticizing a child (rather than the behaviour).
  • Not discussing or involving parents/carers.
  • Lack of awareness of space required for a particular exercise – forgetting that lines and bodies limit the area.
  • The coach failing to communicate the purpose of the exercise to each player.
  • The coach speaking in generalizations.
  • Failing to consider the health and safety of the players.
  • The coach offering a running commentary.
  • Spectators and additional players encroaching on the field.
  • The coach trying to demonstrate something which he cannot do (Steve: I do this a lot!!)
  • Using drills that involve children standing in lines for more than a few seconds.
  • The coach failing to spot flaws in the practice and subsequently neglecting to make appropriate corrections.

Forgetting that the teaching process involves:

a. communicating the instructions;

b. organizing the practice;

c. offering the key teaching points.

The ideal youth soccer coach

Everyone involved in soccer coaching needs to understand what children want from their ‘ideal’ soccer coach.

Most importantly, it is important to treat children with respect and not as if they were objects. They like you to listen and take notice of their feelings and opinions.

A recent series of interviews with 140 young athletes in different sports gives an idea of those aspects of coaching which young athletes think are important. The opinions, which were given, may change according to sex, age, and sport; these are just the general comments.

Knowledge. Coaches should know their sport well and most children prefer coaches who have participated in the sport. It provides them with credibility.

Personality. Children like coaches who are friendly, happy, patient, understanding and have a sense of humour.

Authority. Children like coaches to be firm but fair, and while boys, particularly, like to be worked hard they don’t like to be shouted at.

Taking personal interest. As they get older and more able, many young athletes like coaches to take an interest in the things they do besides sport.

Reaction to performance. When they do well, children like the coach to say “Well done” but they don’t like them to “go over the top.” (OTT) When they do poorly, they like to be given some encouragement and told what went wrong. They want to be told how to correct mistakes and not to be shouted at or ignored.

Encouragement. Most children, particularly in team sports, like to have the coach shout encouragement to them when they are competing.

Decision making. Few young children express a wish to have a say in the decisions which affect them; they expect coaches to coach and trust them to make the right decisions. As they get older and more experienced, they are more likely to want to be consulted. This may be the case with13+ children

Organisation. Children like coaches to be organised and present structured coaching sessions. They also like them to take responsibility for seeing that they are in the right place at the right time

Instruction and feedback. Children do like to be shown what to do, how to do it and to have mistakes corrected. In short: teach them!

DO:

  • Be aware of the effect you have upon growing children.
  • Find out what the kids expect to get out of sport with you.
  • Be firm, fair and organised.
  • Give credit where it is due and give help where it is needed.
  • Be consistent.
  • Provide learning experiences: teach.
  • Make practice and competition fun; it needn’t be silly.
  • Set challenging goals tailored to the individual.
  • Recognise the value of friendships between children.
  • Show your approval whenever you can.
  • Listen to the children
  • Relax and enjoy yourself with the kids.
  • Emphasise learning skill, not competing.
  • Reward children for effort.
  • Help children over the realisation that they might not have the ability of others.
  • Build confidence by being positive.
  • Reduce competitive expectations.
  • Help those who do not want to compete.
  • Tell children about how outcomes are affected by things other than their own ability.
  • Remember that mistakes are part of learning.

DON’T:

  • Put kids down for not doing as well as you wanted.
  • Shout and humiliate them.
  • Ignore them when they need some support.
  • Blind them with science they don’t need.
  • Overdo the praise; they won’t believe you.

Half time team talks

Tweeeet! The whistle has blown, and your players are jogging off the pitch. The first half is over, and before long, the second half will begin. You have seen moments of accomplishment, periods of wavering stamina, goals scored, successful and unsuccessful tackles, different types of passes and much more. How can you possibly relate all of your feedback concerning the first half in a typical 5 to 10 minute half-time speech? As a coach, what are your responsibilities during half-time, and how can you make the most out of the little time you have?

Primarily, what you say during half-time should be succinct, helpful and clear. You have an entire half of a game to recount, and you have a very short amount of time to do it. Brevity is clearly a must. In addition, your players may be weary, and half-time is also an important time for them to rest their legs, re-hydrate and catch their breath. In order to get your points across effectively, using simple language and clear explanations are necessary.

Generally, your comments ought to provide your players with feedback concerning the progression and the outcome of the first half. It may seem impractical to impart advice about half-time speeches given that the first half of every game will be slightly different from the next. We do not know the strengths and weaknesses of your players, nor do we know the type of opponent your team is up against. We can, however, provide valuable recommendations to consider as necessary topics to cover. These tips will help make your half-time speech effective, concise and encouraging.

Pitch conditions

The conditions of the pitch and certain unfavourable weather conditions can subtly or drastically affect the game. If it is raining, the pitch will be wet and the ball will travel faster across the grass. A slick ball may also be more difficult for a player to trap. Is it windy? A team that attacks with the wind blowing from its back will have an advantage as opposed to the team that must fight the wind head on. In addition to the weather, what are the conditions of the playing surface? Is the grass trimmed well or is it rather long? Longer grass is more difficult to run through and may be more trying on players’ legs. The ball travels a longer distance on a pitch with short grass. Are there uneven spots on the pitch? Are there divots, bumps or large dirt patches? Are your players aware of these areas? Is the pitch short, long, narrow or wide? For instance, narrow pitches have a short distance between the side of the penalty box and the sideline. Caution them about how the pitch conditions may have affected their play, and advise them to be mindful during the second half.

Player sense and vision

It is always helpful to remind players to be aware of their surroundings while they are on the pitch. Anticipating where the ball is going, knowing where teammates are and getting in position are vital off-the-ball skills that can only be mastered if a player has good pitch sense. Sometimes players only examine their own positioning on the pitch in comparison to where the ball is located. Encourage your players to see the entire space around them. In addition, advise players with the ball to keep their heads up so they can make important choices relative to dribbling, passing and shooting.

Play your game!

You may be wondering what coaches mean when they encourage players to “play their own game.” Although it is helpful to know the strengths and weaknesses of an opponent, frequently coaches expend too much energy discussing the other team’s skills and identifying the better players. What skills have you and your players focused on in practice? When your team has possession of the ball, where are the team’s strengths, and what strategies work well for your players offensively? In the first half, did your players execute the skills and strategies that you worked on during practice? Remind your players of these tactics, and encourage them to take control of the game as a team. Advising a team to “play its own game” incites confidence, promotes teamwork and plays toward your players’ strengths.

Pressure the ball and mark up

By putting pressure on the ball, your team will force the opposing team to work harder. Pressuring the ball increases the possibility that an opponent will make mistakes, thus increasing your team’s opportunities to retrieve possession of the ball. Every player on the pitch must play defence when the opponent has the ball. To protect your goal effectively, each player must be defensively alert, and everyone must pressure the ball. Although only one of your players may be marking the opposing player who has the ball, your entire team is responsible for defending. Supporting teammates must mark up and effectively guard their players to block any potential passes or runs. A team that pressures the ball and defends as a unit will break down the opponent’s methods of attack. Have your players been “going to the ball” and attacking opponents as soon as they receive the ball, or have your players been waiting for the opponents to advance, only challenging them after they have complete control of the ball and are ready to be challenged? Has the opposing team been able to make passes to players who are not “marked” or defended, or has your team done a good job of anticipating passing lanes and shutting down those potential passes to unguarded players?

Communication

Finally, it is always useful to remind your players to talk to each other. Soccer players cannot use their hands, but there are no rules that prohibit the use of voices! Your players should consider their voices as aids on the pitch, because verbal communication is very important, whether your team is playing defence or is on the attack. “Someone’s on your back!” “Double-team!” “I’m on your left!” “I’ve got number ten!” Players warn others about potential tackles, and they can help teammates make good runs and find open passes. At the same time, you need to critique your players, to advise them whether the oral advice they have been giving is good advice and whether they have taken the good advice from their teammates. For example, a player who constantly runs down the pitch yelling “I’m open! Pass it to me!” may not actually be open and may be giving advice contrary to what you as the coach have been telling your players to do. Is that player actually open? Would it be a good idea for the player with the ball to make the pass that is being requested? Is the player yelling for a pass when the player with the ball is in an open space and should continue dribbling? At the same time, when players are yelling advice, are their teammates listening and following it properly? When a player correctly calls for a pass, is the player with the ball trying to make that pass or are they moving ahead on their own, trying futilely to dribble through several solid defenders? Overall, communication is a fundamental tool of a successful team, and it is a skill that should be utilized at practice. Remind your players to open their mouths and communicate.

Keep it up!

Some of the most important topics to discuss during half-time concern what your players are doing well on the pitch. Choose a few maneuvers or skills that your team mastered in the first half. Highlight a few great passes, plays or combinations during the first half that were noteworthy. You may choose to provide three positive and praiseworthy remarks for every negative comment or piece of constructive criticism you report. Ultimately, it is important to praise your players as well as provide constructive criticism. Positive reinforcement boosts confidence and increases the likelihood that certain skills or plays will be repeated.

These suggestions for effective half-time speeches will remind young soccer players about some very important basic concepts. Nevertheless, based on the tone of the first half, there may be many other topics you wish to cover during half-time. Here are some more questions for coaches to ask themselves at the end of the first half of a match.

Is your team taking advantage of set plays and free kicks? Are your players having trouble defending against them?

Consider the possible physical advantages of the opposing team. Are players on the other team exceptionally tall? Is your team having trouble getting the ball away from taller opponents? Is your team shielding the ball successfully? Is the opposing team more aggressive than your players?

What are the strengths and weaknesses of the opposing goalie? Is he/she better in the air? On the ground?

What specific calls has the referee made? Does it seem that the referee is paying more attention to certain types of fouls?

Are your players being spectators? When players do not have the ball, they should be moving to support the player with the ball or moving toward a better position to receive the ball. Passive observers on the pitch do not help a team succeed.

What formation did the opposing team use in the first half? Should you alter your team’s formation to better respond to your opponent? How can you use the other team’s formation in your team’s favor?

Have your players been using the pitch effectively? Do they keep trying to plow straight ahead, and should they be moving the ball across the pitch more? Are they passing as much as you would like or are they dribbling too much? Are they passing when no one is on them, and you would prefer that they take the ball forward themselves more? Are they making short passes or kicking long balls past the defense for their teammates to chase (and is that what you want them to be doing)? Are they supporting their teammates, moving into open spaces when they do not have the ball, moving forward with the attack, and retreating to help defend? Have they been playing the game the way you have been coaching them at the level of ability that you can reasonably expect of them at their age and stage of development?

How did the process of substituting players in and out of the game go during the first half? Do you want to tell your players to work as hard as they can, then signal you (or you will see) that they should come out for a short rest? Or, do you want to tell them to pace themselves so that they will have sufficient reserves to make the necessary sprints when a scoring opportunity (or severe defensive threat) presents itself?

To review, clarity and brevity are important objectives of the half-time speech. Do not try to address all the topics listed in this article in a single half-time speech. If you are worried that you have too many items to discuss, do not try to cram in everything. Be selective. Try not to say all the same things every half time or your speeches are not likely to be effective. Try to identify the few key changes that may help them improve, and applaud their play when praise is appropriate. Encourage them to keep it up.

In addition, it may be beneficial to leave time for questions and comments at the end of your speech. During the game, you have a particular vantage point as a coach and as a spectator, but your players have very different perspectives on the pitch. Players’ comments and suggestions for the second half may be useful supplements to your half-time speech – and it will give you some time to catch your breath! Good luck, and remind your players to have an orange slice and to stretch if they desire.

Decision making for very young soccer players

This practice session will help young soccer players to make their own decisions. It uses the well established and successful technique of guided discovery – a technique that should be understood and used by all youth soccer coaches.

Introduction

The purpose of this training session is to encourage informed decision making by young players regarding where to pass the ball, receiving the ball, and moving off the ball.
Too many coaches of young children tell their players where to run, when to pass the ball, and where to pass the ball to. Making decisions for your players may result in short term wins for the team but it stifles player development. Players from a young age who are encouraged to make decisions for themselves, to experiment and not worry about the consequences will turn out to be more skilled and capable players in the long term .
Even 5 and 6 year olds can be taught simple ideas and encouraged to think about their options with regard to passing and moving without the ball.

The approach of using guided discovery is used during this practice session. It is a simple process – begin by asking questions and then encourage the players to work out the answers for themselves. This is a proven and more effective method of learning than simply telling children where and how to pass the ball.

A word of warning – guided discovery requires you to really know and understand what you want to get out of the training session. You need to think carefully about the type of questions you need to ask.

Warm-up: passing in pairs

Players get in pairs and pass and move within a designated area.

Begin with free-style passing then make it more directed by telling them to run around a cone that is on the outside of the grid after they pass and before they receive the ball back from their partner.

Key coaching points

  • Technique of passing ball
  • Eye Contact
  • Passing to correct foot
  • Passing to feet or space
  • Pace of pass

Some of the questions that can be asked during this activity (not drill) are:

If a player without the ball is running toward you, where you should pass the ball? Answer: To their feet. As the coach, you may have to give them the choice of saying either “feet or space”.

If a player without the football is running away from you, where you should pass the ball? Answer: To space. As the coach, you may have to give them the choice of saying either “feet or space”

How do I know my partner (teammate) is ready to receive a pass? Answer: Because they are looking at you. (Eye contact)

Even in the warm-up, you have asked them good questions, without you necessarily having to show or tell them. Ask them! You will be surprised at what they can tell you.

Then play a small sided game (scrimmage).

The point of this game is to get into a winning position and then keep the ball away from the opposition for a set period of time. It provides young players with many opportunities for making decisions relating to running into space or a supporting position.

When players are participating in this game, you will find many moments as a coach to ask them the following questions:

If a player with the ball has pressure, where do you run support or space? Answer: support

If a player with a ball doesn’t have pressure, where to you run support or space? Answer: space

You are planting a seed in their mind of where they run during a match. As a player, you can only run to either support or space. The amount of pressure that is on the ball determines where you run when you are close to the ball.

The entire training session then is continuing to ask them these questions, not demanding anything, but asking them constantly what are their thoughts?

How to deal with players who won’t listen!

How do you deal with players who don’t listen at practice and games?

First, it is important to tailor your practice to your players’ ages. If the player or players in question are under eight years old, they are probably just exhibiting personality tendencies common to that age group: short attention spans, high energy, sociability, an inability to understand certain detail-oriented explanations, etc. It has been shown that it is fairly unproductive to attempt to teach players under eight years old the technicalities of soccer such as corner kicks, goalkeeping skills, throw-ins, etc. At this level, the kids just want to have fun and get touches on the ball. This is why small-sided soccer is so important at this level. Playing with less players on the field results in more children getting touches on the ball, and consequently, more learning and more development.

For players eight and up who have been playing soccer for at least one previous season and who should be accustomed to how a soccer practice is “run,” discipline problems can be treated as such. Unfortunately, these discipline problems can run the gamut from not listening to being disrespectful to other players and coaches. Try not to be too hard on the player who won’t listen to you—after all, these kids have been “listening” in some form or other to an adult all day at school, a place that is filled with lines and lectures, two non-kid friendly items.

At soccer practice, out in the fresh air, the kids may feel compelled to just run around and burn excess energy, which is OK to an extent, but can become detrimental when its affecting your ability as a coach to teach the other players important soccer concepts.

  • Remember that you are the coach, not a “buddy.” Some people have the ability to pal around and still inspire unconditional respect from their players. Some do not. If you are in the latter category, it is important to have respect first. Be nice, always, and do not lecture, but be firm.
  • Do not tolerate rude or disrespectful behaviour. This should result in a “time-out” for the player who is acting up. Be sure to judge each situation in a new light. Some players don’t mean to be rude—they just weren’t paying attention at the time. Only consciously punish consciously rude behaviour. Be aware that some medical conditions can cause children to behave in seemingly disruptive ways.
  • Send a letter home to parents describing your coaching philosophy—what you expect from your players and what they should expect from you. Explain that the first “incident” will result in a physical activity such as “knee-jumps” (he stands still & jumps, raising his knees to waist height—quick and less disruptive than laps), second in a time out, third in sitting out practice and a letter home, fourth in asking parents to attend practice, etc., at your discretion. Examples of proper soccer practice behaviour:
  • Everyone must follow all directions given by the coaches & assistant coaches
  • Everyone must do their best
  • When coaches talk players must be still and listen
  • Everyone to be a good sport whether we win or lose (this includes parents)
  • No swearing or name-calling
  • Disruptive or disrespectful behaviour will not be tolerated
  • Keep your hands to yourself
  • Do not kick your ball in the air unless coach tells you to do so
  • Buy a whistle & use it to get attention!

The most important thing to remember when dealing with ANY players under 13 years of age is that they are at practice mainly to have fun and play the game of soccer—which, finally, is just a game. Taking the game too seriously, or making practice too much like school, will result in your players becoming uninterested in the game.

A good idea is to schedule an “energy burn” session into your practice. Think of how you feel sitting in your office all day long on a beautiful spring day. These kids feel this sensation 10x more than you do-— humans are simply not designed to sit inside all day. Your players have their whole lives to sit at desks and listen to other people. Playing soccer, going for a run, playing golf or tennis—- these are the ways that we all use our physical energy that sits dormant for most of the day.

Let your kids “go” for a majority of practice in the form of a keep-away game or cone drills. Explain the drills briefly, and then let them run around and play. Players do NOT learn by listening to a coach lecture. In fact this is the best way to make sure the kids tune out and do NOT listen. Let them dribble, shoot, pass, and run to their heart’s content, and they may feel more compelled to pickup the soccer ball on their own at home and do just that.

How to communicate with players, parents and officials

In your role as a soccer coach, you need to communicate effectively with a lot of different people: your players, parents, grandparents, officials, other coaches, association directors, etc…

All of them have different agendas and need communicating with in different ways.

The Players

Communication with your players goes far beyond simply giving them instruction. If you took a communications class in high school or college you will remember that more than 50% of communication is non-verbal. Facial expressions and tone of voice also convey a great deal of the communication.

Leave the sarcasm at home! Players may place a great deal of importance on anything you may say or do, possibly more than what their parents’ may say or do. Also, although it can be tough with 12 jabbering kids, try to listen to each one, allowing each one to talk in turn.

A few pointers:

Talk to the players’ on their level, both physically and emotionally. This may mean getting down on one knee and looking into their eyes as you communicate. Use simple, direct statements that will be less likely to be misinterpreted.

Don’t wear sunglasses on the practice or game field. Players need to make eye contact with you to fully understand the communication.

Be positive, honest and sincere with your players. When trying to correct a particular skill problem, it can be advantageous to make the mistake yourself, and then point out your own shortcomings. Players will respect a coach that is honest. Be positive: constant ‘nagging’ will only ‘turn off’ your players’.

Tell them what you want to tell them, tell them again, and them tell them once more. Try to reword your communication each time. This will give you a much better chance of getting the communication across with ALL the players.

Be loud enough that all players can hear you, but don’t scream at them. Clearly understood voice communication will get their attention and your respect. TIP: In one-on-one communication, a whisper may serve the purpose and be much more effective than a normal or loud voice.

Avoid inconsistent or confusing body language. I.e. don’t turn your back on a player talking to you, expecting praise, attention or instruction… Shaking your head while telling the player “nice try”…

The Parents

After your initial parents meeting you may or may not have a great deal of contact with the players’ parents. If a parent should contact you during the season, you should…

Listen
Listen
Listen

They may be concerned about their child’s skill development. I.e. “Johnny makes a lot of goals, but my kid…”. Just be positive about their child’s development unless you too have a concern that their may be a medical or physical condition that needs attention.

They may think you’re a lousy coach, or you just haven’t developed a relationship with their child. If they’re wrong, try to rectify the miss-communication, but not at the expense of the team. It could just be the parents or child’s problem, and you probably can’t “fix it”.

Finally, if you need to talk to a parent, do it after a practice or game where you can speak to them without children being present. Sometimes a phone call or e-mail will work just as well.

The Officials

Maybe it works for Alex Ferguson, but it won’t work for you. Yelling at or disagreeing with the coaches will solve little during a game. What it will do is show your players that you are disrespectful of the officials, and they will tend to do the same. If there was clearly a bad decision, bring it up after the game with the official or later at a specially called meeting.

The “Other” Coaches

Make an effort to seek out and greet the other coach before the game. By establishing an acquaintance, you may be able to accomplish more together than alone. For example, at the first game of the season, you may have some new players that can’t play an entire half. It is very likely he has the same situation. So the coaches decide to have ‘unlimited or free’ substitution. Like the official is going to argue with BOTH of you! I don’t think so. In most associations that tend to be non-competitive, the two coaches can then determine the best use of the rules for “THIS” game.

Communication skills

youth soccer coaching - communication

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